Barry Diller, the chairman of IAC/Interactive Corp., was at Harvard Business School explaining the rationale behind the mosaic of interactive commerce companies he had assembled at IAC, such as Ticketmaster, Hotels.com, Match.com, and LendingTree.com. One of the students pointed out that these various businesses seemed to be operating independently, not in a coordinated synergistic fashion.

Diller erupted in mock anger. "Don't ever use that word synergy. It's a hideous word," he said. "The only thing that works is natural law. Given enough time, natural relationships will develop between our businesses."

I agree. What applies to disparate parts of a giant company also applies to disparate people in an organization. You can't force people to work together You can't mandate synergy. You can't manufacture harmony, whether it's between two people or two divisions. You also can't order people to change their thinking or behavior. The only law that applies is natural law.

The only natural law I've witnessed in three decades of observing successful people's efforts to become more successful is this: People will do something - including changing their behavior - only if it can be demonstrated that doing so is in their own best interests as defined by their own values.